


Clumsy, clumsier, Onew

by sky_fish



Series: Early Works 2012-2014 (unedited) [7]
Category: SHINee
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2012-08-12
Updated: 2012-08-12
Packaged: 2021-03-06 04:01:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,867
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25667098
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sky_fish/pseuds/sky_fish
Summary: Leader Onew in his best condition and pissed off Key because of that... or is he just worried?
Relationships: Kim Kibum | Key/Lee Jinki | Onew
Series: Early Works 2012-2014 (unedited) [7]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1828948





	Clumsy, clumsier, Onew

**Author's Note:**

> Welcome to my first and only ever SHINee fanfiction. This is just something small for fun that I wrote way back in 2012 and since I am currently crossposting some of my old stuff from lj/dw to my AO3 account, now it's this story's turn. Tbh, I was considering if I should even really crosspost this or not, but in the end, I decided to just do it. After what happened with Jonhyung, fans are processing and grieving differently. I admit, for me, ever since it happened, it's been hard to listen to SHINee. I still love their music a lot and I'm sure, there will come a time when I'll be able to listen to their music and watch their old videos again without only feeling sad and I am looking forward to reaching that point. Jonghyun, RIP, you'll never be forgotten.

Onew was 19 when he debuted with the group SHINee in 2008. Since he was the oldest among the 5 members, he gained the position of the band's leader. Key was about two years younger, but actually, he was the one watching over the older one, who was just being the most clumsy person the world had ever seen, bumping into doors and walls randomly, falling from seats, stumbling on the dance floor not only during practices but also during live performances, and often talking gibberish that just made no sense at all. All of those scenarios made the younger man shook his head, sighing, quite often.

How could that little idiot be older than him? And how should SHINee become popular with such a clumsy leader? Key really worried about that. Maybe, he was just a bit too earnest for his age but his career was really important to him. So, seeing Onew laughing about his own clumsiness sometimes really made him angry. To make it short, Key was pretty annoyed by Onew and so, in order not to snap at him someday, he tried to keep their interactions at the lowest level possible. He didn't want to risk ruining the harmony of the group by being impolite to the older group member or anything like that.

Sometimes, he wondered how Jonghyun, Minho and Taemin were able to handle this so well and how they were always able to stand by their leader's side. They laughed with him (not _at_ him), cared about him, they seemingly didn't mind his clumsiness at all and instead, it rather looked like they were watching over him like parents over their children when they started to explore things by themselves, letting him try and fail and pick him up nevertheless. 

Key wondered, why this was too hard to do for him. Instead of encouraging Onew's behaviour, he constantly seemed to worry. He was annoyed, he worried about their image and, of course, when Onew managed to continuously hurt himself over and over again, he also started worrying about his bandmate's physical and mental health, as well. It really could not be healthy for a young man to regularly crash his head against random things! And what if the leader managed to hurt himself so badly one day and wouldn't be able to perform alongside with the other members? What would happen to the group? Key even already had had nightmares about SHINee ending up with a brain-damaged leader wrapped in bandages like a mummy, wheeling him around on stage to keep their formation. Well, at least an early form of a brain damage would explain Onew's strange sense of humour.

\-----

One day, eventually, it happened. 

"That's completely unprofessional! How is it possible that he just does not improve a bit? Bumping into something here, falling off the stage there, throwing the microphone away when he is supposed to sing -” Key had started rambling, “being the laughing stock par excellence on national TV shows and during interviews, hurting himself again and again, how should he be able to represent our group properly?! I don't want to have a "clown"-image or something just because of that clumsy person, that's just embarrassing!"

Eventually, Key had exploded. 

The boy was complaining loudly about SHINee's leader in the dressing room after another TV appearance of the group, during which they had been promoting their new single. And of course, something unexpected had happened. And of course, it had been embarrassing. 

Key's voice had reached an incredibly high pitch during his lamenting. The other members of SHINee were staring at him in disbelief. Onew, who of course, was among them, quickly shied away, when his and Key's eyes met for a second, he seemed extremely uncomfortable and... hurt. Key's heart constricted for a moment. Maybe, he shouldn't have used such harsh words and talked about his bandmate as if he wasn't even present. In the end, what he had wanted to prevent – being impolite towards the older man – had come true, after all. But perhaps, what happened, had just been too much. 

\-----

Just about an hour ago, Onew had managed to bump into the setting, nearly demolishing the whole thing and burying himself under wood, plastic and fabric. When the other members and the hosts of the show had pulled the young man out of the mess again, Onew had looked surprised from the shock and was even more surprised when Minho worrying pointed out that he was bleeding on his forehead. Thank god the show's staff was prepared very well and after a short examination of the luckily only minor injury, Onew had returned onto the stage, grinning widely, assuring everyone that everything was fine, as he pointed at the band-aid on the wound.

Taemin and Minho had simply been relieved, Jonghyun had laughed it off and just quickly scolded their leader jokingly while slapping his shoulder so hard that Onew nearly lost balance, again. And Key had just stood there, staring at Onew in disbelief. Had Onew really hurt himself again? Key's nightmare about having to wheel their mummified leader onto the stage, played in his head, over and over again. 

Key really had to pull himself together to not immediately jump at their leader, screaming at him or slapping his face until his stupid grin had vanished. He had just injured himself, he had even ended up bleeding, and all he did was grinning stupidly and playing everything down! Key still couldn't believe it and for a moment he had wished the ground would just swallow him whole so he didn't have to deal with this situation. 

At least, it hadn't been a live show. But nevertheless, Key was utterly frustrated, no, he was angry about Onew's clumsiness. He even had managed to hurt his head! That could have ended way worse than just with a small band-aid! Seriously, their leader was just too careless! Key had been seriously shocked and he hated that among all of the emotions that Onew's careless behaviour triggered in him, it was worry that was growing larger every time, the more often something like that happens. It was way harder to deal with than simply being embarrassed.

So, after the show Key had rushed into the dressing room without another word to his bandmates, had changed his clothes as quickly as he could and had already been ready for departure when the other members arrived. Jonghyun had eve asked him, slightly confused, if he had some important plans or why he was in such a hurry. Key had not wanted to answer and was about to open the door and leave by himself when Onew had grabbed his hand and held him back. Key froze.

"Kibum, what's up?" the older one asked the boy with a worried voice when Key turned around glaring at the older one with the band-aid on his forehead – making him look only more silly.

"Don't touch me, idiot," Key had hissed, shaking off Onew's hand, who had just looked at Key with a not only surprised but also hurt look in his eyes. 

"Idiot?" Onew whispered with a slightly cracking voice. The look on his face had turned from happy to desperate just within a short moment.

"Yeah, idiot," Key had repeated, mumbling, but avoided Onew's hurt look.

"Hey, Key, stop being so rude towards people older than you! What's going on? Why are you so mad at him? Or is this just another one of your mood swings?" Jonghyun had asked and grabbed Key by the shoulder, forcing the younger one to look at him.

"You really don't need to call him an idiot!" Taemin had bumped in. “Apologize!”

Key had ended up rolling his eyes at that. He got it, their youngest group member was really looking up to Onew, after all, so if anybody was saying something against their leader, it was to be expected that Taemin would stand in for his sake.

"Taemin," Onew had tried to calm down the youngest, smiling at him to show that he was OK – or at least faking to be so.

"Pretty moody today, huh?" Minho had finally added as well, crossing his arms in front of his chest.

"If you have a problem, then just say it!" Jonghyun had provoked Key.

Thus, feeling that everyone was against him, anyway, Key had exploded, letting out all of his thoughts about Onew and his clumsiness, that had accumulated in his head up to that point.

\-----

So, after calling Onew an unprofessional, embarrassing, bad and clumsy leader, all of the members were now standing there, staring at Key, speechlessly. No-one had expected him to ever say something like that. They knew that Key could be moody and it had happened sometimes, that he snapped at something or just made some drama, but never before he had directed his anger against one of them. 

Minho and Jonghyun had just frozen, Taemin was still gasping for air and Onew just looked truly miserable. Admittedly, seeing such a sad look on the usually constantly cheerful leader's face, left a deep impression on Key. It was like it hurt him just as much as his stupid outburst must have hurt Onew. Damned, he hadn't expected to feel that crappy after finally speaking up. He even wished he could take back his words. 

It was true that he had been embarrassed and annoyed by Onew's behaviour. Of course, he was pissed about the fact that everyone seemed to be on the leaders side, not understanding Key's point of view, at all. But he didn't want to make Onew look like that. He didn't want to make him sad. After all, it wasn't like he hated him, no, actually...

Onew was still looking down, searching for words or maybe he was just not able to say anything at all, however, just at the moment Key wanted to apologize, Taemin angrily stamped onto one of Key's feet with such force, that instead of an apology a surprised and angry screech of pain left Key's mouth and the other members backed off in fear.

"TAEMIN!" Key screamed and he was close to punching the younger idol, but instead, he just glared at him as if he wanted to kill him. “Are you crazy!?”

He cursed. Now, he was _really_ pissed off. He turned towards the dressing room's door again, pulling it open, left the room and slammed the door behind him. Key rushed down the corridor to leave the building and take a break when the dressing room's door burst open again and he could hear Taemin's voice screaming after him.

"Hey, Key! YOU are the idiot here! Make sure to apologize to Jinki!"

Another door slam. Key turned around and made a silent "f*** you"-gesture towards the closed door and pulled himself together to not jump back and instead, angrily walked ahead.

\-----

Out of the building, he decided to take a walk through the nearly located park to cool down his temper. Right now, you man didn't know whom he was angry at, the most. Onew, for being the biggest klutz on earth, worrying everyone and making himself and the group the laughingstock of today's TV broadcasting? Taemin, for being a hyper bitch stamping on his foot, Jonghyun and Minho, for stabbing him from behind or even himself, for exploding like that and hurting Onew's feelings? Even if he had been pissed, he really didn't want to hurt him. But what should he do now? Going back into the lion's cave to risk that Taemin would snap at him again, didn't sound like a great idea. Key wasn't willing to sacrifice his second foot as well.

About half an hour and a cup of tea from a coffee both in the park later, Key's guilty conscience had reached its peak and he just couldn't think about anything else than Onew's hurt eyes anymore. His heart ached. Damn it, why did he get so weak now? Wasn't he still really pissed off because of his bandmate? Didn't he say at least a bit of the truth? But somehow, none of these excuses didn't work any longer to make himself feel better. Key cursed, brushing his hair out of his face. After he had thrown away the empty paper cup, he quickly pulled out his cell phone.

For a few moments, he stared at the blank display, not even sure if he really should try to do this but then he sighed again, gave in and dialled the number of his bandmate. Nervously, he held the phone next to his ear and waited for response. Waiting and listening to the monotone free-line signal seemed endless. Key's heart seemed to beat faster and faster with each second of waiting. Why was he so damned nervous all of the sudden? Because he was feeling guilty? Because he feared Onew would be mad at him? Then suddenly there was a break and Key's heart stopped beating for a moment, but instead of Onew picking up the call, it was only the leader's stupid and hyper happy message from the answering machine.

Key cursed. He tried to reach Onew a few more times, each time becoming more nervous and worried. But he had to apologize, no matter what. He knew that he had been mean and he had to admit that it was understandable, that the others were mad at him now. What had he been thinking?! As if a hysterical performance like that would have made anything better... And now he felt so damned sorry about it.

Since Key could not reach Onew at all, he worked up the courage to go back. The others must still be waiting since nobody had contacted him to tell him that they would leave first. When the young man had returned to the building, he went straight back towards the dressing room. He took a deep breath as he stopped for a few moments in front of the door. It wasn't easy for him to go back and apologize in front of everyone. He was a proud man, and it was hard for him to take back something he said. But he understood, that he had messed up this time and that it was necessary to clean up.

Key opened the door to meet three angry faces. Taemin was sitting there with his arms crossed in front of his chest, Minho seemed to try his best to cool down the anger of the band's youngest and Jonghyun sighed, partially relieved, partially annoyed, when he saw Key. He stood up and stepped closer to the young man who had just entered the room.

“Key, where have you been?” he asked.

“More important - where is _he_?” Key answered the question with another one when he realized that one person was missing – Onew.

“We don't know, either. He left, shortly after you ran away like a super diva. He wanted to go to the toilet but when Taemin followed him after twenty minutes to check on him, he wasn't there any longer. We couldn't find him and he doesn't answer his phone.”

“I know, I tried to reach him, too,” Key whispered. 

He sighed. Did he hurt the leader really so bad that he had escaped from the scene? Maybe, he was hiding somewhere to get his thoughts together, like he had done already, some time ago...

“I hope you're here for apologizing?”

“What do you think I am here for? Letting Taemin stepping on my other foot?” Key glared towards the youngest, who just stuck out his tongue and said that Key had deserved it for hurting their leader. “Definitely, not!”

Key left the room again. If Onew wasn't at the restroom any longer, and he hadn't returned to the others since then, either, he must be somewhere else in the building. 

Key thought back to the time shortly after SHINee's formation when they just had held their first performance. Onew had been sick for days before the event and still hadn't recovered completely. He hadn't had the energy to practice their dance choreography properly and so their dance coach got really mad at him during their last training. The Coach even asked him how the hell Onew had managed to get into the K-Pop-group with such sloppy performance skills, and if he was sure that he didn't want to quit.

When Key remembered correctly that had been the first and the last time so far that he had ever heard someone screaming at Onew. Since then, he had done his job as best as he could. It wasn't true, that his performance skills were sloppy. Onew's singing was just the most beautiful Key had ever known and he was able to remember all of their choreographies perfectly. And even if he managed to fall off the stage or something similar, his clumsiness was quickly forgiven, since for most of their fans it seemed to be part of his natural charm. 

To get out of his thoughts, Key firmly shook his head. He remembered exactly, where Onew had been hiding back then since he had been the one who had found him, probably, he would be lucky, again.

\-----

Key hurried into the garage of the building, where the car was parked with which the group had come to the show. He knew that besides the manager who drove them, most of the time, Onew also had a key for it. And when Key came closer, he really found the car unlocked. Relieved, he opened the door and looked inside, and it was just like he had expected. Onew was sitting in the back row, curled up in a dark corner. His secret hiding place. Key had never told his bandmates where he had found Onew back then. The boy stepped into the car. He reached out his hand for the other man and gently touched his shoulder.

"Jinki?" he asked carefully. Since the older one did not really react, Key continued. "I'm sorry for what I said, Jinki, really, please don't be mad at me."

Still no reaction. Key could feel how he slowly but surely started losing control again. He let out a huge sigh, trying to stay calm. Finally, Onew lifted his head a bit.

"What do you want? Just leave me alone so that I cannot disturb you with my clumsiness," the older one seemed to be serious. He still sounded hurt.

Actually, it was rather unusual for Onew to show other people his true feelings. Key knew that. He also knew that the leader would not have reacted that way in front of the other members. He was a good leader and didn't want to act childish in front of others. Well, let's put aside the fact that running away and hiding in a car was childish behaviour as well. Key sighed. He had not thought that Onew was so sad about what had happened.

"You don't disturb me, really. I just... I was nervous and I'm worried," Key crawled a bit closer to Onew, whose face was still covered in the darkness of the corner he was hiding in.

"About the good image of SHINee?" Onew had turned around and his eyes shined slightly through the half-dark car's back-row. Had he been crying?

"Well, yes but not only that," the younger one assured him. 

"You're the first one that complained about my bad habit that much. I really feel bad about it, now. But I can't just switch it off or anything..."

Now that the two men were sitting side to side, Key could see the traces of tears on Onew's cheeks. He didn't really know what to do when his heart clenched in his chest, and before he realised what he was doing, he had put his hand on top of Onew's head and slightly pulled him in for a hug. It felt a bit unreal and Key realised that he could not remember that he and Onew had ever been so close to each other before. The leader's body felt warm but also weak and fragile in his arms.

"I know," Key whispered. “I'm sorry,” he repeated. He really was. Seeing Onew in such a condition nearly broke his heart. Now, at the latest, he was sure that he preferred a happy, funny, maybe a bit stupid acting Onew.

"Is it really that bad? You know that I'm not doing that on purpose, right?" Onew had lifted his hands and buried them into Key's shirt, pressing his forehead against the younger one's shoulder.

"Yes, I know that. That's one reason why I'm worried. I'm afraid you could get hurt badly," Key said honestly while patting Onew's back. 

Holding the older one in his arms like that just enhanced the warm feeling that was developing in his heart and all of a sudden, he felt the desire to protect his bandmate even stronger than before. His heart started to beat faster.

"Really?" the older one looked up and his big dark eyes made him look like a cute puppy.

“Yeah," Key brushed his hand through Onew's hair.

"So you don't think I'm just stupid and annoying and clumsy?"

"Well, maybe a little bit but I think my worries about you are stronger. Now, will you please forgive me and come back again? Taemin will kill me if we don't makeup and I think the others are pretty hungry already and want to go eating."

“Can I get chicken?" the sadness in Onew's eyes finally had vanished and Key could not help but laugh.

"Yeah, sure!”

And then, Onew smiled and everything felt alright again. Key answered with a smile himself. That was the leader he knew! And somehow, he was really relieved to have him back. It hadn't been Key's intention to make the other man cry, but nevertheless, maybe it had been good to let out all of his thoughts once. At least, now he had found out his real feelings. Even more than when Onew was clumsy, he worried about him when he was sad and he never ever wanted to be the one who created that look at the leader's face. And clumsiness, well, maybe it was not curable, but maybe Key could pay more attention in the future to prevent his clumsy bandmate from serious accidents.

Key told Onew to follow him, as he exited the car first. While he was lost in his thoughts he didn't really notice that the young men behind him seemed to have run into some kind of trouble again and so, he only turned around in surprise when he heard Onew screaming.

“Ah, Kibum, watch ou-!”

But it was too late. Key found himself with his back on the ground, pressed down by the weight of something that had just crushed out of the car and right on top of him. Key's eyes were squinted in shock, the back of his head was hurting, but therefore, Key felt a pair of soft lips pressing against his own. Which, surprisingly, felt really good.

Maybe, being clumsy was not completely useless, for once.

THE END


End file.
